Four days until my travels begin

Italy is quickly approaching and I have a great deal to do still. Check that, I have EVERYTHING to do still.

I have not begun to pack in the slightest. I feel like if I pack now I will forget a great deal of stuff. I do this before every trip I go on. Wait until the last minute that is. Actually, I do this with most things in life. Steve gets frustrated with me because I wait. But I do not know how to function unless I feel pressure to meet a deadline. Beginning work two weeks before a deadline seems like nonsense to me. Maybe because I like the sense of accomplishment I feel when completing a task just before a deadline. Packing is thus the same way.

It is strange. Everyone keeps asking me if I am excited. My honest response, No. If you ask me within the next few days if I am excited, I will probably say yes. But in actuality I will be lying because I don't want to feel stupid and get a lecture from one more person about my lack of excitement. Enthusiasm and Excitement do not go hand in hand for me. Enthusiastic I am, excited, no. Not that I am not eagerly anticipating my travels and learning experience. I just am not excited. I have NO idea what to expect from a European country to excite me. People have shared their personal experiences and while they have been enlightening, they are not mine so it is difficult to feel a connection and understanding. At the moment, I feel calm and peaceful. Not energetic and excited. I don't think that is a bad thing, I think it is just a thing. I believe once I arrive and begin to know the routine and expectations in Italy I will become excited about the prospects and experiences I will have. I always take time to process and understand my experiences whether they be in my classes or real life experiences. I choose to sit back and observe and take in the whole picture. I think and then usually is a few days, I begin to understand and see my role in the experiences. I think this will be the case with my trip to Italy.